Hi Steve,

Thank you for your testimony. It’s very important for people undergoing the same process or living the same experience to get a feedback from others who went through the same thing.

Last year in January, I lived through something similar though very different. I had zero “hallucinations” or visions, really none. My perceived reality didn’t change a notch (my vision, hearing,… none of my senses were changed). However, I started to have “ideas” or thoughts pop into my mind that I had never had before, in a way which was very strange. Typically, when you have a thought, even if it’s original, you can still, in retrospect, justify it by seeing how it’s related to what you already know and how you managed to rearrange your thoughts/ideas to come up with something “original”, or trace it’s origins more generally. Here, these were ideas that I had never had, and based on nothing I ever knew or read. Prior to this experience, I was the person you are now: “Big Bang, science, rationality, evolution, we are evolved apes, there is no life after death, God does not exist…” And then, suddenly, from a moment to the next, I was sure, absolutely certain, that God was real, but that he/she/it was nothing like what was described in the Bible.

This experience happened after I started to take an interest in existential questions like “why are we here”. I asked the question to myself, in all honesty, setting aside all my “beliefs”, really asking it like a child would ask, with no pre-prepared response in mind. I asked: “what is the Truth?” And from that point on, I didn’t sleep for two weeks and wrote dozens of pages of thoughts/ideas that came to me in a way that defies all logic. What is funny is that I had a similar experience to yours with your Kundalini. I had no idea what was happening to me. I didn’t know what spirituality meant, I didn’t even know what “esoteric” meant. Yet after my experience, which lead me to the emergency psychiatric unit in a hospital, I went to a psychologist to whom I explained everything I had lived through and the “truth” I had “received”, who gave me a book to read, and in that book, I found the exact same “ideas” and revelations. And unfortunately for me, unlike you, there is no way to retrospectively find a “scientific” explanation for this. How do you explain that your brain “generates” original thoughts which are completely unrelated to anything you’ve ever read or believed, and then you find those same thoughts and ideas expressed in books, and which simultaneously provide for a potent explanation for how you came up with those ideas.

Since you’re into neurology, I invite you to look at the works of Anil Seth. His work tends to prove that reality is just a collective hallucination produced by the brain. But we call it reality because we agree on it, or we experience the same hallucination, therefore it’s “reality”.

The point I’m making is that everything that your brain produces is a hallucination. Right now, as you’re reading this text, you are on LSD. It’s just that since everybody else is as “high” as you, they call it the “norm”, and any hallucination which deviates from the “norm” is called a hallucination.

Finally, I’ll share some of the insight I have received, if you have the courage to read all of this, because when I asked for the Truth, I got an answer which tries to reconcile spirituality and science.

The starting point of my revelations, because you have to start somewhere is the principle of perfect symmetry or supersymmetry. Very similar to the works of mainstream Mathematicians and Physicists like James Gates.

The principle of supersymmetry can be summarized by this basic explanation: “For everything that exists, it’s opposite must exist”. Instead of going straight to physics, it’s best to apply it to Math, as it’s the “purest” of all sciences. It obviously makes sense to say that if +1 exists, -1 has to exist. This is directly linked to the “puzzle” of theoretical physicists: explaining that you can have “something” out of “nothing”. If, by adding up everything that exists you get nothing (like adding up +1 and -1), then the Universe can be seen as “nothing” fooling around, pretending it’s “something” for a certain period of time, reverting back to “nothing” and back again (the infinite, cyclical expansion/compression theory).

This principle of supersymmetry can then be applied to vibrations or energy, which is one and the same thing. That is, if you have a certain vibration/oscillation, it’s opposite vibration (opposing phase) has to exist. Notice that quantum foam or quantum fluctuations very much look like a 3D bubbly chaotic state, as if vibrations and their opposite vibrations were continuously appearing and cancelling each other out. Indeed, the state of the “void” can be a continuous and chaotic creation/destruction of energy/vibration emerging from the unstable state of “nothingness” (an inherent property of the paradox of infinite “nothingness”, which cannot not produce this quantum foam).

Now comes the most important and interesting part: in an infinite space made up of quantum foam, there will necessarily be one point in space where, out of sheer randomness in infinity, a process of what I call transcendence occurs: the Universe finds a way to move beyond a continuous creation/destruction of vibrations by creating the photon. Basic physics tell us that photons behave like a wave and a particle. The “real” question is what does a photon really look like and what is it made of? Well, think about it: how do you transition from a state of chaotic quantum foam (chaotic vibrations/anti-vibrations) to a photon? You create a black hole made up of pure vibrations. So a photon is basically quantum foam with torque added to it, which allows the photon to become a self-contained set of vibrations/energy wrapped around itself in a double torus fashion. You could also say that a photon is simply a self-contained bundle of energy/information.

Now apply the same principle of supersymmetry to an infinite space made up of photons, and you start to get how this Universe functions. It is a permanent process of avoiding a superposition of two perfectly symmetrical “realities”. But you won’t find “proof” of this symmetry inside our Universe. This symmetry is outside of it.

Finally, how fast do you think the first photon appeared out of the void? The answer is: it appeared instantly, in no time.Why? Because if you have an infinite void, then the probability that it appeared instantly is infinitely certain. And how about when did the first sub-particle, the first atom, the first star or even the first living cell appear? The point I’m trying to make, is that there will always be one place in the Universe where time flowed infinitely fast and all of it’s constitutive elements, laws, principles appeared instantly. That is what is at the very “center” of a black hole. Einstein’s principle of relativity is very useful here: time flows infinitely fast the more you get to the center of the black hole. This is where you get your “simulation” theory. You could say that our reality is simply a holographic projection of one possible “story” or timeline which leads to the center of a black hole, where all “logic layers of the Universe” (as I would call them) materialized instantly: atoms (the rules of physics), molecules (the rules of chemistry), living cells (the laws of biology), humans (whatever laws apply to human interactions)… Notice that chemistry can be seen as a “transcendence” of physics: moving from a state of the Universe where atoms would collide into one another in a chaotic way, to one where they would bind and form something more complex than the sum of their parts. And biology is a form of “transcendence” of chemistry: a living cell can be seen as a very complex, self replicating chemical reaction controlled in time. And humans can be seen as a transcendence of biology. And each layer doesn’t “break” the rules of the previous layer, but whatever can be “built” from that extra layer adds complexity to the Universe. You could ask: “but why”? Well, it’s simple. Go back to quantum foam and vibrations. In fact, do you really think the reality we perceive “exists”? After all, you could simply see each of these “layers” of reality (atoms, molecules, living cells…) as extra information added to a self-contained bundle of vibrations/energy. In short, the purpose of each layer is to be an ever more complex scrambling algorithm which prevents an otherwise perfectly symmetrical Universe from meeting it’s exact mirror image, and reverting back to “nothing” or a state of chaotic quantum foam.

To finish, I would like you to consider that this “Russian dolls” logic doesn’t end with us. Our cells are composed of trillions of atoms, and we are composed of trillions of cells… Don’t you think that each single human could be one “cell” inside a form of “living organism” which we are far from imagining? Of course, now we are getting metaphysical, but just consider for a minute, that if time flowed infinitely fast in one specific area in an infinite space of nothingness/quantum foam, then what we call “God” is simply an “ultimate future” which exerts a form of attraction on the void of space around itself, creating a form of “coherence” which leads, inescapably, to “manifest” all that it IS? In this regard, the only rule or rather, the only force which exists in the Universe is the force of attraction that the future exerts on the past, and all of the laws that we observe are but side-effects or byproducts of this one law. That is what explains that we exist. Why do you think humans “emerged”? Well, simulate the “story” of a solar system without us in it: a bunch of organic life eating itself for 5 extra billion years until the star goes super-nova and you start over. It’s a pointless, circular story. However, add “humans” (or rather, sentient self-conscious beings) in the mix and suddenly you can tell a bit more interesting story, one where we colonize the solar system, protect life from the Universe’s dangers (asteroids, natural catastrophes)…

I don’t know if you even bothered to read all this, it may all seem very far fetched. But if you have the patience, I invite you to read a series which I started to write last year, after a very weird experience I had. If you read it with an open mind, you may find that it offers an original point of view on science, our reality, religions, God etc..

What you have experienced, in your Kundalini awakening, is like installing a new version of an operating system. It scared you and you reverted to your older one. But which one is true? Which interface is true? Windows 95? Windows XP? Linux? MacOS?

Which “reality” is true? The one perceived by a dolphin? The one perceived by a bat? The one perceived by a fly? That is the main problem with science. You cannot “do” science outside of the reality we are stuck in limited by our 5 senses. The machines we build, we perceive them from our 5 senses. The information it gives us is perceived by our 5 senses. It’s like doing “science” inside a video game. What can you really learn from that? If you want to dig further, I have written extensively about my own experience. Thankfully, I have not met a “guru” and stayed away from the esoteric “woo woo” people, because indeed, they live in their own “bubble”, their own dogma, which is as much a problem as the people living in the “science” bubble. Once you really understand the Universe, you’re less concerned with what is true, and more concerned about what the implications of believing X or Y are for humanity and where we are heading.

https://medium.com/@marma.developer/my-spiritual-journey-3-the-nature-of-reality-abc06dc42c67